Sunday, May 18, 2008

how to uglify your house.

this will be a short post. it's 4:56am. gavin's alarm clock woke me 20 some odd minutes ago and i couldn't go back to sleep. i tried. nothing. i thought to myself, "bathroom, coffee, cigarette, computer. will feel better." so, in that order, i proceeded to (sort of) wake up. then my home page (msn) came up and i was faced with the headline, "How to de-80's your house", which i think is a good idea. what i think is a bad idea, however, is their suggestion that you replace possibly very ugly (i'm thinking circa 'Miami Vice') with even worse. all i have to say is that if your options are between something out of an A-Ha video and this... NO!! stick with A-Ha. that guy was kind of cute and it least your 80s house doesn't look like a My Little Pony and a Carebear had a fight to the death in it and the both ended up exploding all over the walls, curtains, asinine number of throw pillows, and anything else that was within hitting distance. and, oh yeah, that plant is SO going to die. it's in a corner! plants need light (even hanging ferns). what the hell have these people been smoking?
maybe if i smoke some i will be able to get back to sleep and i'll have lollipop dreams...

Friday, May 16, 2008

is anyone else feeling a little glam today? do you think you can handle it?!?!?

just cus i want to!!!
and only the best will do!!!



want some more, do you? ok then, we'll mix it up a little (while still being fabulously glam!!)

Saturday, May 10, 2008

some british telly for yous...

since the last post i decided that you all might enjoy a few youtube excerpts from some of the shows i mentioned...

here's one from still game (my favorite scottish show)-


now how about something from the young ones-


maybe some fawlty towers?


how about blackadder?


maybe some black books?



yes, prime minster for you m'lords-



father ted (am i still on this fecking island?!?)-



bottom (another classic from those young ones boys)-



i'm alan partridge-



and finally a bit of coupling-



happy viewing!! hope it's not too much- feel free to take them in slowly. revel in the british humo(u)r!!!

Friday, May 9, 2008

Britain's best sitcoms (according to me)

so, yesterday meeg drew my attention to this list on wikipedia that has a list of the 100 greatest sitcoms that britain has ever produced. the list is totally bunk. it's got it alllll wrong. at first we were both aghast that monty python's flying circus and the fast show we're on it, but then we decided to forgive that as they probably don't really qualify as sitcoms. so, in true nicole, 'i'm right and you're wrong' spirit, i have decided to make up my own list of the best british sitcoms (don't worry, mine will be MUCH shorter).
the other thing is that my list is going to be in no particular order (you can't ask me to pick which is better, blackadder or the young ones! that's just not fair!!).
ok, so here we go...


1) the young ones- i'm starting with this one because for many of us (myself included) this was my true entre into the world of the british sitcom. it's sheer genius. rik mayall and adrian edmonson are brilliant and there are just too many classic one-liners to even begin to mention them ("vegetable rights and peace!").












2) black books- i'm opting to put this one so high up on the list (even though it's in no particular order) because i can't get enough of this show. i can watch it over and over again and never tire of it. dylan moran (the star and writer of the show is sheer genius- i have a feeling i'll be using that word a lot in this post- and he's just the funniest guy around. you may know him from all of the simon pegg movies (who, incidentally, does a cameo on black books) like 'shaun of the dead'). it's about this mad, drunk, chain smoking irishman and his two ridiculously messed up cohorts who run this bookshop in london. it has great jokes and one-liners that can be texted back and forth with meeg for years and never lose their comedic appeal ("no, i'm not gay. i thought you were, actually." "yeah, so did i, until i found out about the prohibitive standards of hygene and all that dancing!"). anyone who hasn't seen black books should rush out and see it right away. it's really a new (ish) british sitcom classic.



3) fawlty towers- no list of great british sitcoms would be complete without fawlty towers. it is the original, the best, the funniest. if you doubt this for even one second, go and watch the episode with the germans. when you're done wiping the tears of laughter from your face you can call me and apologize for ever having doubted me. john cleese really uses everything in his bag of tricks in this series. he does his sarcastic and intelligent humo(u)r, he acts like an ass, he does the silly walks, he goes into full blown panic mode in the way that only he can do, and he is just all around hilarious. granted, i would never stay in his hotel, but i love watching what happens when people do.

4) blackadder (all four series)- this show is brilliant on so many levels. firstly, the cast of characters that appear on the show are astounding. you have rowan atkinson, of course, miranda richardson, hugh laurie, rik mayall, stephen fry, and many other fabulous british comedic actors. secondly, each series (there are four) are set in different time periods. the first is set during the reign of richard III, the second is set during the reign of Elizabeth I, the third during the regency of Price George, and the forth is set during WWI (this is the one that is actually the most poigniant and kind of sad as it shows what life would have been like in the trenches. it is, of course, told in a comedic way, but it's underlying theme is quite heartbreaking to watch). the main character, blackadder, is constantly forced to deal with idiots throughout history (presumably, the series follows the blackadder family, which is a bit of mystery as all of the characters always die at the end of each season- so how is blackadder reproducing?). his (or he and his decsendants) are always sharp witted and intelligent (and sarcastic in the extreme), and it is just one of the most fantastic shows that there is.

5) yes, minister/ yes, prime minister- one wouldn't think that this show would work as well as it does. it's such heavy political humor that you'd think it would be dry and almost incomprehensible (unless you have a very clear understanding of the inner workings of british politics), and yet somehow the writers were able to create a funny and engaging show about civil servants, mps, and prime ministers that is very heavy handed in terms of political comedy and make it totally accessible at the same time. you can start watching it without a single iota of knowledge about british politics and still find it extraordinarily funny. nigel hawthorne as sir humfrey appleby is one of the great comedic characters of all time. the show really highlights the ineptitude of government officials (an episode springs to mind in which the prime minister, the right honorable james hacker, played by paul eddington and his principal private secretary, bernard wooley, played by derek fowlds, are searching on a globe for 'st george's island'. one of the foreign secretaries has to point out to them where it is. they speculate that there would be trouble if the russians ever tried to invade st george's island and the foreign secretary points out that they wouldn't as the americans have a permanent fleet stationed in the big blue patch the surrounds the island. as hacker and wooley glare at the globe in a vain attempt to figure out what the big blue patch is the foreign secretary says in a very snide voice, "it's the indian ocean"). the shows political insight is fabulous and the insanity that always insues is fabulous. i would highly recommend the episode, 'the key'. it is one of the best.

6) father ted- what is there to say about father ted? it's one of the best shows ever (i suppose all of these shows are). it's the story of three priests who live on an island off the coast of ireland and have ridiculous madcap adventures. there's ted, the main priest, who is sensible and intelligent, if not a little ridiculous. there's dougal, who's just a complete idiot, and then there's father jack, who is and has been drunk for as long as anyone can remember (there's one episode in which he actually sobers up. as soon as sobriety hits he looks around and exclaims, "am i still on this fecking island?!?"). it is a constant barrage of criticism of organized religion, and the catholic church especially. there are classic lines like when dougal says, "you're not meant to take it seriously are you, ted?" "you're not meant to take what seriously, dougal?" "you know, heaven and hell and everlasting life." "you are SO meant to take it seriously, dougal!!" and then with a dumbfounded look on his face dougal replies with a, "NO!!". it's sheer comic genius. if it weren't for the sad passing of dermot morgan, who played father ted, i'm sure that we would have many more seasons of this fabulous show to enjoy. as a footnote, i would like to mention that one of the writers of father ted was graham lineham, who also co-wrote black books with dylan moran. obviously the man's got talent.

i think that's about enough for now, although i would like to give out some honorable mentions to some shows that really do deserve a place on this list and that i would write about if i weren't bored of this subject already.

7) bottom- with the same guys who did the young ones

8) red dwarf- sci-fi show meets comedy. can't beat it.

9) men behaving badly- ok, can be totally ridiculous sometimes, but all in all it's a funny show.

10) coupling- british audiences hated this show. i LOVE LOVE LOVE it (as does meeg). jeff is maybe the best comedic character ever in the history of comedy (maybe that's overstating it a bit). it's friends meets seinfeld meets sex in the city meets something you've never seen. watch it!! it's a must!

11) i'm alan partridge- takes a bit of getting used to, but when you warm up to it, it really is a funny show.

12) the office- need i say more?

13) spaced- the show by simon pegg (of 'shaun of the dead' fame). really funny, and if you like his movies, you'll like the show.

14) still game- the best of the scottish sitcoms. it's really one of my favorite shows of all times. if you can learn to understand the think glaswegian accents, you'll be laughing your ass off.

15) only fools and horses- one of the most popular british sitcoms of all time (i don't know one single brit who doesn't love it).

Sunday, May 4, 2008

Big Easy Rollergirls


so, a couple of weekends ago gavin and i went to the championship match of the 'big easy rollergirls'. i must say that i am now a roller derby convert. we went because my fab friend katie (from law school) skates for The Crescent Wenches and our bitchin' friend lauren (with whom gavin works) skates for The Confederacy of Punches. these are some bad-ass bitches. i would try to explain how the game is played, but that would be a feat that i don't think i could handle. suffice it to say, they beat the crap out of each other on skates while the fastest skater tries to lap members of the other team to score points. it's pretty damn brutal. if you get the chance to check out some roller derby i highly recommend it (i mean, come on, can you beat women in tight clothes and fishnets beating the crap out of each other on roller skates? i don't think so!!).


by the by, katie (aka Louise ze Animal) and Lauren (aka Cheap Thrill) are the best skaters they have. they totally kick ass and (even though they're on seperate teams) they are my absolute heros!! keep kickin' ass ladies!!

here's some stuff and pics about my two girls--

Cheap Thrill
Skate name: CHEAP THR!LLNumber: #40 oz. Hometown: NOLA (by way of transplant)Team: Confederacy of Punches (how deep?)Position(s): Powerblocker/Comic ReliefSkate size (men's): 8












Honorable injuries: Quadruple Tib/Fib ankle fracture with peek-a-boo bone feature. All the rage in early 2007! More recently, an intense impact to the right knee, which resulted in a large smiley face bruise and a traumatized bursa named Gregory.Notable tattoos: One green spiral. Small and half-faded, rarely seen.Unusual talent(s): I am nothing, if not an entertainer. I also hold the current title of league beer shotgun champion.













Most (in)famous for: Being the first Big Easy Rollergirl ejected from a bout. Also well known for being Membership Manager/Attendance Hard Ass, the Penalty Wheel Mistress, a committed vegetarian, and for saying and doing whatever is currently on my mind due to an apparent lack of impulse control.Awards (2006/2007 Fleur de Wheelies):• Rah-Rah Award: Best League Spirit • Nom de Pummel Award: Rollergirl Most True to Her Name.Item always in skate bag: An amalgamation of things both necessary and otherwise. I rarely clean out my bag.

"If I wasn't in roller derby I would be.....": still waiting to live in a place with a roller derby league I could join. It was only a matter of time and couldn't feel more right. That's why I keep coming back after injuries. It's my destiny!

Motto: Reject the popular idea of how things are supposed to be and explore life for yourself. There are no guarantees in this world, so be happy and have fun...just not at the expense of others' well-being.

Drum Roll Please for my main girl...

Louise ze Animal- Skate Name: Louise ze Animal Number: 42 usc § 1983 Hometown: N'awlins. And H-town. (That's "Hammond," yo.) Team: Crescent Wenches, BERG All-Stars Position(s): PivotSkate size: 7 (men's)


Honorable injuries: Scar on my left thigh from reccurring rink rash. Giant creature/callous on my right foot. Scar on my right ankle where my first pair of skates-
cheap ones- took a bite out of my foot. While jamming as a sub for the Villains, I got a bone bruise to my knee. Oh, and at boot camp I sustained shoulder socket bruises, as a byproduct of the first time I was ever hit
by Cheap Thrill. Luckily, none of these has been career-threatening. Notable tattoos: I have an invisible tattoo of "Crescent Wenches" across my heart. Unusual talent(s): Changing clothes while driving. I'm a harried, mobile Clark Kent. I also can talk like Bill Cosby on "Bill Cosby Himself," when he gets the injection at the dentist's office.



Most (in)famous for: Pointy shoulders. I sharpen them. Awards: No BERG awards. I am angling for "Skater With Most Spirited Fans," because Momma Animal constructed about 40 pom poms in Wenches blue and pink. Lacy Underalls is giving me a run for this award. Item always in skate bag: about 5 mismatched filthy socks, and some lamb's wool.












"If I wasn't in roller derby I would be.....": Very sad. And overweight. Motto: "Don't judge me by my size because I will take you out at the knees." - Bert Spahr.
















Keep on rockin ladies!!! Next season it's all the way!!
Love you both!!
Support local roller derby!!