The Easiest Hard Game Show In The UK

ok, so there's this game show here called, 'eggheads'. in it, a group of five contestants (a team of people who all know each other somehow) are pitted against these 5 people (same ones every week) who are somehow the best quiz show contestants in british history. one of them won 'who wants to be a millionaire', one of them (the most impressive one) won some show called '15 to 1' (which is now off the air but was apparently really, really hard) no less than 3 times, one of them won brain of britain... and that's not all they've won. let's just say that these five people have a score of quiz/game show wins between them (some of them amazingly impressive). so, the thing is that there's a preliminary part in which there's a specific area of knowledge (like arts and books or science). one of the contestants picks an 'egghead' to go up against in a head to head. they answer three multiple choice questions each. if, at the end of that, they are tied, it goes to sudden death in which the questions are no longer multiple choice. this is usually where the contestants lose to their chosen 'egghead'. whomever loses the head to head is knocked off. this happens four times until they come down to the last person (who does not do a head to head). this is when the show moves into the 'general knowledge' section. the remaining team members (those who didn't get knocked off in their head to heads) sit at the table and are allowed to confer on the questions asked. i've seen episodes where it's all 5 eggheads against one poor soul. i've also seen ones where people manage to knock off some of the eggheads (although it's rare for more than one or two eggheads to get knocked off). anyway, it's played the same way as the head to heads-- three multiple choice questions and then sudden death. the prize for the show is 1,000 pounds but every time a team loses that money rolls over to the next show. the one gavin and i just watched had a prize of 73,000 pounds.
thing is, i want to go on this with my hand-picked team (i'm looking at you here-- gavin, meeg, richard and allyson). i think we can do it. they are after all, not unbeatable...

My new obsession...

ok, so there are so many things that are different here in the UK (but we knew that that was going to be the case, yes?). there are also so many things that are the same, though. the grocery stores are essentially the same (other than the fact that we have no whole foods and that they sell things like, 'bovril', which is like gravy that you drink as far as i can tell-- oh, and don't even get me started on the many flavors of 'crips'... things like 'fish and chips' and 'cajun squirrel'). yes, they do drive on the wrong side of the road AND the wrong side of the car. yes, they're weird and don't have guns (but that's a good thing). but so many things are the same... there's coke AND pepsi and all of the fads and television shows that come from the states make their way over here.so, we come to why i've even brought this up...i have been known, in my time, to buy a magazine or two when the mood strikes and the magazine looks interesting. and while they DO have the same magazines (although, of course, they have some that we don't and vice-versa) they're the british versions. this is not the big news, though. the big news is that magazines here aren't just magazines!! magazines here invariably come with some sort of bonus extra that doesn't cost you any more. all of them have free gifts (and i'm not talking samples of perfume that you have to tear out and then apply to yourself by rubbing paper on your body!). they come with PROPER free stuff... bags, books, toiletry cases, make-up, toys, cds, guitar pics... every type of magazine has its own type of surprise free gift (the lamest is the 2 for 1 deal wherein you get 'hello' and 'cosmo' for the price of one-- but still!!! that's something you would never see in the states!!). every time i walk into a shop i MUST scan the shelves for what's on the go with even the crappiest of mags.

here are some examples that i found on the shelves just this month...

my fave! red (which is an ok mag) with this really cool free 'beauty' bag in it (i got the one that is black with white thistles on it-- it's really cool and i would have paid the 3 pounds just for the bag!)
i don't remember what mag this was but it came with a free (nice) beach bag that says, 'i heart urban outfitters' on it

even the kids get toys. a free dinosaur thingy.

ok, kind of lame... the two in one pack of bazzar and hello

maire clair with a free book (lots of them have free books but i won't post more than this one)
glamour with free...mascara, i think it was

a teen mag with free nail care kit
a teen mag with free lip gloss

Is This Shit Following Me Or Something?

i know that it's been ages since i last posted and much has happened since then. i left my beloved new orleans (which is actually one reason that i haven't written- i wasn't quite sure what to do with 'from the streets of katrinaville' when i was no longer actually ON those streets. i can't change the web address- that i know of- and from the streets of aberdeen just doesn't sound right). i think that since i've been here for about a month now (and because i can say with all certainty that my heart still remains very much rooted in new orleans) that there's no problem with me posting here as I am from the streets of k-ville and no relocation will change my feelings for my birthplace.

so i'll give a quick run-down just for those of you who are interested and need filling in (although this isn't really what this post is about).

the last weeks in new orleans were pretty hectic. i worked until the 31st of march, we made sure we got our last paychecks, moved out of our apartment, hung out with as many friends as possible, made sure we were packed and had all of our money, etc together and set off around the 9th (i think) to drive from nola to washington, d

c. in the last week or so of being in new orleans i caught some strain of the flu that was so horrid and hard to shake that if you now told me it had been swine flu i would not question you on the diagnosis. gavin got it first and then gave it to me so i was actually more sick towards the end than he was. i didn't even get out of bed for the last three days. i stayed in my brother's apartment and attempted to sleep off my raging fever. anyway, the day came when i knew we had to leave regardless of how i felt and so off we drove. we stopped in atlanta even though we were meant to see lovely liz in greenville. i was too ill and the weather too bad to go any further the first night. we then drove through to my brother's in dc. rather than see lovely meeg or even go see any of the things that i had wanted to (the cherry blossom trees were in bloom) i stayed in and slept in yet another brother's apartment trying to shake the never-ending fever (and somehow i had totally lost my voice along the way). we stayed for t

wo days and then my brother drove us to new york so that we could catch the boat. once more, we didn't get to see lovely suzie as we were only in brooklyn for enough time to unload the car, give scott a hug and go check in to get on the boat. i spent the first 3 days not leaving the cabin. just too sick. he explored plenty while i slept. we ventured out a little in the last two days but i still wasn't feeling very well. we met his parents in southampton, drove up as far as blackpool (which is a whole different post) for the night and then completed our journey the next day, finally arriving in ellon.

now i've been here for almost a month (and no, i haven't seen the loch ness monster- in fact, i haven't even seen loch ness) and have done surprisingly little. the first week was a wash. i had to sleep to fully recuperate, we had to unpack, there were so many loads of clothes to wash that it's kind of unbelievable, etc. then began the task of organising the mundane-- i had to get a bank account (a painful process that took over a week), register

with the national health service, make sure that my address has been changed properly with folks like the irs, etc. i have done some sight-seeing and venturing out but, again, that's for another post.

what i really want to talk about is that fact that it seems like, since i've been here, i've somehow brought with me from the states an infection. shockingly, it's not even the flu that plagued me for so long- it's a political one. just as i was thinking to myself, 'ok, i can leave the states now, obama has it under control, i don't have to worry anymore' i come to a country that i felt had always had a more solid, socialist leaning, competent (ish) political system. the W virus that i brought with me though has spread to whitehall and is cracking that very government at its roots. there's now talk of totally re-hauling parliament as the scandals that are breaking on a daily basis are unearthing corruption and gross mis-use of public funds (and g

eneral fuckery) on a level that can only put down to something like the W virus.

so, here's a basic rundown just so that you know a bit about how it works so that you can know a bit about why it's falling apart...

in the UK there are districts. each district has an elected official that is an MP (a member of parliament). these mps all sit in the house of commons, which is effectively the same thing as congress if the house and senate sat together and yelled and jeered at one another openly and a lot (which is actually really entertaining- watch 'prime minister's questions' on c-span if you haven't or want to see hilarious political posturing and just good old fashioned british comedy). thing is that here in the UK, party affiliation means A LOT more than it does in the states (if you can believe that). mps ALWAYS vote with their party, th

ey DO NOT cross party lines in any vote on any proposed legislation. the country votes as to which party will have the most mps in the house and from that party rises the prime minister (who isn't really directly elected in the way that we elect the president). there isn't so much a set term for the prime minister as there are 'general elections' which either confirm that the country still stands behind the party that is presently in power or demands that another party assume control and then their head buffoon becomes pm. labour had always been the liberal party and the conservatives were, well, the conservatives. thanks largely to tony blaaauuughhhh and his lap-doggery with W the labour government has become more and more conservative and the liberal democratic party has pretty much taken their place and the actual liberal party in the house. nonetheless, labour is still in power (although it se

ems that there will be an inevitable shift from that in the next general election). the prime minister MUST call a general election under a number of different circumstances- but let's not get into that now. let's just say that he doesn't have to right now- mr. gordon brown (who is scottish, by the way) has about another year to sit around and continue to fuck things up until he has to put it to the vote and risk allowing his party to be ousted as the controlling party.

so, here's the BIG problem... in trying to fix the faltering economy (as all governments are trying to do) it has recently come to light that mps are given what are essentially expense accounts. only thing is, they aren't expense accounts because all they really have to do is hand in receipts, etc and they are just given the money they claim. they can claim money to pay for second homes (the logic behind this is that they have to live in the district that they represent but must also be present in london to sit in the house, therefore they have to have two actual residences) and the upkeep thereof. this is just bloody insane as they are all paid

well enough to afford flats in london or in their districts without pulling from the public purse to pay for them. it's also crazy because not one of them uses this nonsense responsibly. they use this second home allowance on crazy extravagant homes with lavish grounds and claim tens of thousands of pounds annually on such fuckery as pond maintenance. even mps that represent districts that are virtually walking distance from the actual house claim second homes, a fact that is controversial and astounding. what makes all of this even better is that none of this was supposed to come to light. it's all covered by official secrets and while the public knew that there were expense accounts, they had no idea how much the mps were spending or what they were spending it on. now it's all been revealed and it comes as no surprise that people are livid. at the same time that all parties are calling for cut backs in spending on

health care and public services, these VERY SAME people are using tax money because their hedges at their second homes are just way too out of control and a landscaper is needed ASAP, lest things really get nuts. at a time when unemployment is out of control (i've only JUST found a job working in a pub and i only got that because i know someone who works there) so more people are forced to rely on government assistance to pay for frivolous things like rent and food mps feel that they are being victimised because last week they said that they were going to have to really cut back on helping people pay for potatoes and thi

s week are being yelled at for using enough tax-payer money to give everyone in the country enough potatoes to last until the end of the century to pay the mortgage on their 2 million pound second home that's an hour's drive from their 4 million pound first ones.

and SERIOUSLY these mps are really on the defensive. not in an, 'i'm so sorry, that was really stupid and irresponsible of me' sort of way but in an 'i didn't do anything wrong! why are you yelling at me? i need that house and couldn't just let the duck pond remain untended, could i?' sort of way. can you imagine how outraged the american public would be if they found out that hillary had used tax money to buy a couple of houses, furnish

them, make sure the grounds remained immaculate, paid staff to clean and cook, paid the utilities and then used even more of it to shuffle herself and her hubby between the houses and washington? the woman would be brought into the town center and stoned to death. here, the mps are being all self-righteous and unapologetic.

so, the public is furious and now everybody's saying that there needs to be a total re-haul of the way the government works. the speaker of the house of commons has already been forced to step down as a result of all of this (a position that that he had held for decades and the first time that that's happened in living memory). they're actually talk

ing about making the system more like the american system, whereby each mp is elected partially because of party affiliation and partially because they are the lesser of all possible evils. they're also talking about making it so that mps actually have individual votes in the house so that each one truly represents his/her constituency rather than just voting with the party. it is not possible at present for an mp to vote across party lines. it just can't happen and they somehow think that this is the only way that anything will ever get done. if that were the case, nothing would EVER get done in washington... oh wait, my bad.

so yea, i get here and within a month corruption and ineptitude become the order of the day in whitehall. awesome.

i can only hope that i also brought with me a little bit of the obama luck and that this means that reforms will shortly be the order of the day. maybe get this place cleaned up a little.

for now, keep your eye out for updates (don't worry, next post will be lovely and light-hearted-- and soon-- i promise). i'll let you know how we're getting on here on the streets of her majesty's kingdom of great britain and northern ireland...

damn, that one REALLY doesn't work.

Arrrgghhh, Scotland, why do you do it to me?

here's the headline...

The break-up of the union now appears inevitable

With nationalism on the rise in every corner, 2008 will see the UK stretched to breaking point. Yet still Westminster is oblivious.

here's the link...

http://www.guardian.co.uk/commentisfree/story/0,,2238275,00.html

this article discusses essentially what we've discussed before. scotland's going to pull out (thereby dissolving the united kingdom), now there are rumblings from wales and (as always) more of a kerfuffle in N Ireland.

here's what i really want to talk about though-- england, scotland, wales, and northern ireland are all a part of the EU (because they are all a part GB, and GB is an EU member nation). if any of them pulls out of the union that makes them great britain it will all dissolve and there will be no more GB. england alone is not an EU member nation. neither is scotland, etc...

so, if it all falls apart do they all get grandfathered right back in? do they all have to re-apply for member status (which takes YEARS)? does that mean that people who know hold UK passports and are members of the EU will no longer be members of the EU? how do they let people decide where they want to hold their citizenship (say you were born in england, lived there until you were 20 and then moved to scotland to work. you've lived there for 20 years, your kids were born there, but you still consider yourself english- do you get to pick to be english? and then are your kids english by default? or do they get to pick when they come of age? do you get to pick at all or do you just become a citizen of whatever country you happen to live in (no matter how long you've lived there or where you were born)?).

this is so infinitely complicated i just can't even stand it!! there's no precedent for anything like this in the EU. i haven't read the entire EU Constitution so i don't even know if they've made a provision for something like this happening.

why is scotland really trying to make life so much harder on me? i've always wanted to live in the UK. i've always wanted EU member status. i'm married to a scottish national. i wanted (note past tense) to raise my kids in scotland, but not if it means they won't be EU members. it's the best club in the world to be a member of, and damn it my kids will be members!! i understand why they want to break away, i understand why they want and what they want, but is there not some way that they can amend treaties, etc and take more control over their own country without actually completely breaking away?

why are they going this to me?!?!?! (not to mention to the people of N Ireland, if they have to re-apply for EU member status they will NEVER get it. they're not economically viable enough. neither is wales). way to fuck it up for everyone, scotland. think of all the other subjugated lands that are your comrades before you run straight to dissolution!!!

they can take away my EU member status, but they can never take away my FREEDOMMM!!

Scotland leaving Great Britain (and possibly the EU)?!?

As many of you probably don't know the Scottish Nationalist Party now has a majority in the Scottish Gov't. One of their biggest platforms is a call for Scottish independence. In the short term this might seem like a good idea. Scotland does have the North Sea Oil, after all. Problem is, that's only going to last for about another 10 years. Where does Scotland get their money after that? And if they pull out of GB does that mean they lose EU member status as well (which would be tragic and detrimental to their economy).
I know that Scotland has wanted to be free of the English yoke since Edward I, but come on! I feel like they're only going to hurt themselves here.
Check out part of the SNP's manifesto and tell me what you think about them pulling out of GB.

I agree with a lot of what it says (like pulling out of Iraq), but doesn't some of it sound a little ambitious (cus yeah, they'll be like Norway in no time!)

passionate about independence and equality for our nation.
The 300-year old Union is no longer fit for purpose. It was never designed for the 21st century world. It is well past its sell by date and is holding Scotland back.
The SNP believe Scotland and England should be equal nations – friends and partners - both free to make our own choices.
Scotland can be more successful. Looking around at home and at our near neighbours abroad, more and more Scots believe this too. Independence is the natural state for nations like our own.
Success for Scotland
Scotland has the people, the talent and potential to become one of the big success stories of the 21st century. We can match the success of independent Norway – according to the UN the best place in the world to live. We can do as well as independent Ireland, now the fourth most prosperous nation on the planet.
With independence Scotland will be free to flourish and grow. We can give our nation a competitive edge.
Peace and Prosperity
Together we can build a more prosperous nation, a Scotland that is a force for good, a voice for peace in our world.
Free to bring Scottish troops home from Iraq.
Free to remove nuclear weapons from Scotland’s shores.
Free to invest our oil wealth in a fund for future generations.
Peace and prosperity - equality and opportunity.
These are some of the best reasons for independence and why the SNP trust the people of Scotland to decide on independence in a referendum.