Oh Academy... way to prove me right

in response to meeg's comment on my last post i have to say that it's a crime that cate blanchett and tilda swindon (meeg, didn't we discuss that somehow they're like 2 sides of the same coin and that it's a weird superman/clark kent thing with them?) are in the

horror film, 'the curious case of... oh, sorry, even the title makes me fall asleep'. they're both so good in so many other things (although i do feel like tilda has a slightly greater propensity to be in questionable things-- 'michael clayton' springs to mind).

also, i'd like to bring up the fact that my boss told me today that he really liked benjamin button and when i said that it was like 'forrest gump' only slower, longer and more painful he responded with, "that's why it was great! it was like 'forrest gump' meets 'titanic'". i don't think that i needto say anything else there. if you feel like you'd enjoy the celluloid bastard love-child of 'titanic' and 'forrest gump' then 'the curious case of benjamin button' is for you. if the thought of that makes you want to stab your eyes out with the needles used for any one of saint angie's tats then don't see it.

i also feel vindicated that i wrote this (and said, 'shame on you, academy!!') the day BEFORE the noms came out and then 'curious case' was nominated for everything from 'best douche in a leading role' to 'douchiest screenplay'. i just KNEW that they would end up rewarding this fuckery. oh, and for nominating angiblahina for best actress, too. if she wins i think it's one of the

signs of the coming of the apocalypse.

i do have to say that the only thing that really saves the academy this year is the fact that they have actually recognized the greatness of 'slumdog millionaire' and its director danny boyle (whose body of work is just plain amazing).

Academy and Hollywood Foreign Press, you are both dead to me now.

ok, so i had a conversation before the golden globes with meeg in which i stated that if angelia joile won best actress for 'the changeling' that i would write a blog post entitled, 'hollywood foreign press, you are dead to me'. alas, she did not win. anne 'my ex-fiance's a felon and somehow i had no idea' hathaway did. i haven't seen 'rachel at the wedding' or whatever film it is that she won for but i have no doubt in my mind that it was better than 'the changeling' (not like i like little ms. anne. i actually DON'T like her- but i dislike angelia far more so all's well).

anyway, i'm off on a tangent here. i didn't write the post because, as i previously stated, angelina didn't win. and then just the other night i saw 'the curious case of benjamin button'. now, if you read this at all regularly then you know that i have a very odd relationship with brad pitt. i love him, i hate him, i'm indifferent towards him, i think he's an ass for leaving jen, i think he's just a man who fell in love, i think he's definitely not as attractive as people give him credit for and yet i will give him that his body rocks. what does not rock IN ANY WAY, SHAPE OR FORM is 'the curious case of benjamin button'. for the love of God, who greenlit this project? it was sort of like the thinking man's 'forrest gump' only it lasted for 732 years and it was less entertaining. it was chock-a-block full of one-liney life lessons, statements that you're meant to carry out of the theatre and hold to your breast as life changing affirmations about the beauty of the world and love and... pardon me, i'm about to be sick into my own scorn (thank you, bernard).

so i come to the reason why the academy and the hollywood foreign press are dead to me. angie and brad might not have won but they were both nominated. angie was nominated with the likes of (i love her) meryl streep ffs!! this implies to all that have not seen 'the changeling' that it was somehow good (and it was in NO way good). 'the changeling' wasn't even about what the trailers implied it was about and angie's performance was over the top (to say the least). she looks so terribly gaunt and skinny that it's disgusting and she's so caked in makeup (more than is necessary even given that it's a period piece and that the women of the time wore a lot of makeup) that it just ruins it more that i thought possible. then we have brad's little pet project that was nominated for just about everything (including best picture). given that it came out on christmas day and that most people haven't seen it yet, this implies to those who haven't that it might be worth seeing. these award shows and the people who do the nominations are playing right into brad and angie's hands. now people are going to waste their time seeing 'the curious case of why anyone thought it was a good idea to make this film'. as my friend kyle said as soon as the film was over, 'well, that's 3 hours of my life i'm never getting back'. and i saw it with allyson, gavin and kyle. between the 4 of us our tastes are pretty varied and cover just about every genre of film. had it been in any way good at least one of us would have stood up for it. there was not a voice in its favor amongst us. i'm even a big fan of movies (good or bad) that show a decent amount of new orleans scenery (take 'double jeopardy' for example. crappy ashley judd movie and yet i'll watch it to look at how badly they mess up the actual layout of new orleans. oh, don't even get me started about how in that movie 'deja vu' with denzel that there was actually a street IN the french quarter called 'king oak street' AND that there's a ferry explosion which kills like 700 people. have you ever been on the algiers ferry? MAYBE you could fit 100 people on there at a push... MAYBE. but i'll watch these films and enjoy the inaccuracies and it makes them worthwhile somehow). 'benjamin button' had none of this... it didn't even really show new orleans in any way that any of us know it (even remotely). it's all centered around this one house and then there are a few shots of the river that could frankly have been shot on any large river in the world. i suppose that the scenes in which he's riding his motorcycle to the lake are pretty clearly somewhere in new orleans although it could have been florida (if i didn't know better). so the movie was bad and it didn't even have the new orleans scenery that saves (to my mind) bad movies.

this whole thing with the hollywood foreign press and the academy saying that these movies (and performances) are worthy of standing side by side with meryl and 'slumdog millionaire' and all of these great movies and actors is just a farce. i have let myself believe, until now, that there was SOME rhyme or reason to their selections. now i see more than ever that it's the popularity contest that everyone has always told me it was. i see the light and because of this (because you said that angelina was even almost as good as meryl) i must say to you, hollywood foreign press and academy, you are dead to me.

ps. this totally doesn't mean that i won't still be watching to make sure that you commit no further atrocities.

Musings on love and leaving...

how can one be certain of love? love that is received, not given. it is not a question of what is in one's own heart and mind, that is for another day. it is a question of how one knows the hearts and minds of those around them. the love that you are given can seem like a fleeting thing-- when you question if their words are real, wonder why the phone rings with no answer, when you feel loneliness creeping up behind you...
it can all be abandoned and a new start can be made. but then how, if you love, can you not care if that love is returned? for what is love without its reciprocation? it is a hollow feeling, a state of unrequitedness that makes melancholy take up residence in your heart and soul.
i sit and wonder if they or she or he still love me, if they will love me when i am far away, if they will love me in 20 years. will we still be friends then? will we still be lovers? will all of those who i hold dear turn from me? will they be lost to me and i to them?
i dread the day when i know that all is lost. i feel it coming on, i feel it rushing towards me like the water from a levee breach. will i drown in the love that i still hold but that is no longer returned? will the heart of my heart break when i look around to see no one around?
my soul cries out, "of course it will! you can feel it coming, you know it will, it is the reason that these questions come to mind. you ask because you know the reality that the future holds. it is the fear of this reality that creates these questions. you think that if you ask that it will not happen. you cannot stop the future. your future cannot be avoided with mere musings."
i look out into the grey snowy monet of my future and i see the little house covered in snow. only the remembrances of love past make the fire burn to keep me warm enough to stave off freezing. in my chair i close my eyes, the love lights flicker as they sputter to nothing but a smoking ember and then so do i.

Oh Tim, What Am I Going to Do WIth You? CC: johnnydepp@piratesareprofit.com, helenabonhamcarter@ilookliketheguyifuck.com

Tim (Mr. Burton?),

we have a problem. it's not that i don't want to like you (i really, really do-- you look like robert smith, after all). it's just that, well, you think you're infallible now (and let me be the first to tell you that you're not). i can't even think of the last good movie you made. 'big fish' springs to mind but i really want to believe that you've made something worthwhile since then. you know, i just looked it up and you haven't. that's really sad. your last good movie was made in 2003. what the hell is going on? firstly, you need to stop working with your baby mama and johnny depp (man crush or no man crush, let him go, man!!). i'll give you that johnny was good in 'edward scissorhands' and 'ed wood' but there's just no excuse for 'sleepy hollow', 'charlie and the chocolate factory', 'the corpse bride' and 'sweeney todd'. and why would you put helena bonham carter into these movies? you turned her from the merchant-ivory beauty turned 'fight club' hotness into a wreck of a woman who looks more like you with every passing day (although she still looks way better than you). get it into your head, you ARE NOT robert smith. put down the hairspray and back away slowly. i'll give you your batman movies (even though the second one was dubious at best) but then you went and ruined it totally with 'mars attacks'. it's almost as if you can't make two good films in a row (or that for every one you make that's good you have to make two that suck. let's not even talk about 'planet of the apes' (which not even 'the nightmare before christmas can redeem). stop using the same actors! don't make musicals! go back to what you know. we liked the dark and brooding tim burton (but not the 'sleepy hollow' type of dark-- that just sucked). maybe even try heading away from that and make more stuff like 'big fish'. it was so good and such a departure from what you usually do. i think that your 'beetlejuice' days are behind you. find a new niche. really. we're sick of it and you're just ruining your reputation. i don't even want to know what you're going to do with 'alice in wonderland' (and as meeg said, 'i'll give you 1 guess as to what two actors are in it'). you make serious films, you're not simon pegg. stop casting the same wonky actors so that they can reprise their rubbishy roles over and over again. please, i once liked you and i think i could again. just turn a corner, see the light, use some different actors... something!! we want the old tim back! the one who entertained us, not the one who makes us groan when we hear he has a new movie coming out. think on it for a while and get back to me. it's not too late for you!! save yourself.



now johnny- you're fab. really, love your work. you've made some great stuff with tim but it's time to break away. he's killing you. 'sweeny todd' was terrible. you can do better than that and you know it. i don't know what's happened to you but you need to shape up. i know that you're best mates or whatever and it must be a blast working with him but if you want to retain a shred of your artistic integrity you MUST break away. go find an indie film by an unknown director and shine in the way we know you can.

helena- ugh, what can i even say to you. 'a room with a view', 'fight club', so many films that you were so wonderful in and then you shack up with tim and now you let him put you in any old thing. it's just not right. you're amazing. look in the mirror. i know you look like him but try and see the old helena. just because he's your baby daddy doesn't mean you have to be in his shitty films. shape up, woman! your career is headed in the same direction johnny's is... nowhere. you'll be lost in the quagmire that is tim burton and you'll never escape. go do a period piece. go do something edgy and cool like 'fight club'. hell, go do anything with a different co-star and director and i promise that you will find yourself again. if not for your sake then do it for ours. we hate to see this happen to you.
so please, all of you, go your own ways. find new and DIFFERENT projects. find different styles. you've hit the wall. it's time to move on and apart. i beg of you.

all my love,
nic

Open Letter to Brad Pitt...

Mr. Pitt (or should i call you Brad?),

there are a few things that i feel we need to talk about. i was reflecting this morning on things i have said concerning you in past posts (and conversations, etc) and i think that i might have been being a bit unfair. that's right, i admitted it. i can't say that i am one of your biggest fans, not by any stretch of the imagination. sure, you're a handsome fellow but i can't even say that i think you're swoon-worthy (hopefully, this isn't something you take offense to- you have plenty of women swooning over you, you certainly don't need to count me among them. i just go for a different type, that's all- see my post on the scots). anyway, i digress. point of fact- you aren't an idiot and i really don't think that i can see you being the mailable type. i made a case that you were wooed into your current relationship through coercion. i don't believe that to be true anymore. i think that you are being truthful when you say that you fell in love.

i have to admit that i'm not a big fan of the jumping ship on your wife thing but i can't say that i don't understand that if you realize that you're not in love with said wife that it's not best for both of you to move on. you must understand that it seems as if your ex is doing a bit of flailing about. it seems as if she's still in love with you and that provoked a feeling of pity in me. one so profound, in fact, that i held you (or more to the point, your current partner) responsible for the pain and suffering of your cuckolded ex-wife.

now, i don't know if that article in which angelina admitted to actually having an affair with you while you were married is true or not. if it is, that's something that i think we both know is wrong. i think that you've been not just a little selfish in the way you handled things vis a vis jen. that whole spread you did in W magazine with angie and your pretend family (not the recent one, the one you did right at the very second of your divorce) was really lacking in tact. i'm sure it was fun and maybe you just weren't thinking but i can't see you as the type of person who would be malicious enough to hurt someone on purpose-- you kind of did though, jen even admitted that that really hurt her. that's not cool. you could have waited to release those for her sake. ultimately though, your relationships with jen and angie (whatever they may be or have been and however i may feel about the two women irrespective of you) are your business. who's to say that jen's not actually just horrid and that she totally deserved the W pic spread (although i don't actually believe that)?

ok i'm wandering all over the place now and i'm sure you're wondering what point i'm trying to make. here we go-- even though i have mixed feelings about your main squeeze, maybe she is the love of your life and it doesn't really matter if i like her. if i want to not like her that should be independent of my feelings for you. my feelings for you are on the lukewarm to positive side (much more leaning toward positive because of

'make it right' and your love for my hometown, naturally [SIDEBAR- everyone who hasn't checked out what brad's been up to down here really, really needs to because it's one of the best things we have happening here. it's still about recovery, it's still active and he's not going away like so many others have. scope it, it's actually really awesome-- http://www.makeitrightnola.org/ ]).


i have to say that i actually DO want to see, 'the curious case of benjamin button'. and not because i think it's going to be so bad that i just have to witness it myself but because i think it might actually be good. and, you've always known that i liked, 'fight club'. there are a few films scattered throughout your career that i appreciate and think are really quite good (i think the ocean's movies are totally self-indulgent but that's a bone i have to pick more with your friend george than with you). there are some that i think are pretty crappy (we both know i'm talking about 'the mexican' again. what were you thinking?). anyway, point is that i'm sorry that i went off saying that you were manipulated. i don't think that you're the type of guy who would be. i'm not saying that i think you behaved in the nicest possible way but i'm still going to accept that if you say you're happy and in love then you are and we'll leave it at that. i like mia farrow but i didn't freak on woody when all of that went down. why should i freak on you (not that i'm saying you're a woody-- let's not get ahead of ourselves) for doing something that was actually a lot less... let's say creepy?



so, let's bury the hatchet. i won't say that your woman conned you or anything like that anymore and just let you have your happy little home life. don't think that this means that i'm going to be all lovey with her though. i still think that there's something super weird about her but again, the heart wants what it wants and i'll leave you alone on that one from now on.
well, i'm glad that that's over anyway. now we can just go have a drink and a smoke and talk about wtf is up with jen and john. oh, too soon? right. sorry.

much love to you and your new crazy mustache,
nic

How do you solve a problem like Mugabe? (and why won't anyone listen to me when i say that we need to pay attention to what's happening in zimbabwe?)

for years now people have been drawing attention to all of the horrible atrocities that go on in foreign lands (and here at home, for that matter). there are always outcries that we should be doing something about the sudan and north korea and iraq (i'm thinking back to before we bungled that one). this whole time i have been shouting (into an empty void, it would seem to me) that something needs to be done about Zimbabwe. i know that some of you know all about it and that some of you don't. part of the trouble is that the international media is barred from entering the country or reporting from within it so the extent of the atrocities and poverty is not quite known but stories do leak out and reporters sometimes (at very great peril to themselves) do sneak in.

here's the situation--

zimbabwe is a landlocked african nation. it's bordered on the south by south africa, just to give you an idea of its general location.

zimbabwe is currently ruled by the tyrant dictator- President Robert Mugabe. he is the one that expelled all foreign journalists. he has been accused repeatedly of gross human rights violations by organizations such as amnesty international. he has been known to harass and intimidate anyone that opposes him. there is a general fear amongst the people of zimbabwe when it comes to speaking out against him because so many of those who do disappear- never to be seen or heard from again. an election was held in march of 2008 in which mugabe ran against the leader of the opposition (whose name i don't know). the opposition leader clearly won but mugabe refused to step down as president and decided that he was going to disregard election results. it was at this point that the UN said that they would no longer recognize the government of zimbabwe as it was no longer a representation of the will of the people. mugabe couldn't care less.

he has created a situation within zimbabwe that (mark my words) will lead to an implosion of epic proportions. the people are starving and frightened to speak out against him. he kills people at random and is known for his amin-esque paranoia. he printed so many zimbabwean dollars and distributed them that he created hyperinflation. the zimbabwean dollar is now literally worthless. the people of zimbabwe (when the can get their hands on it) use US dollars as currency.

the people are so hungry and lack food to such a degree that a relatively new thing is happening. people are going out and finding strips of dirt by roadsides and in abandoned fields and planting seeds and attempting to grow and harvest what they can.

i could go on forever about what we think we know about mugabe and the horrible things he is doing. instead, i am going to go through a number of bullet points so that you can make your mind up about how far this situation has gone and how long it's going to be before the country implodes completely.

- mugabe has expelled all foreign journalists. in doing so he has taken control of all media within zimbabwe.

- mugabe is an undeniable racist. he appropriated all of the land owned by minority white farmers and kept it in the name of the government. there was an amendment brought up for a vote in the parliament calling for the reappropriation of white owned land. when it failed to win the vote mugabe's men began invading white-owned farms. those who did not leave voluntarily were often tortured and sometimes killed. one was forced to drink diesel fuel as a form of torture. in April 2000 parliament pushed through an amendment, taken word for word from the draft constitution that was rejected by voters, allowing the seizure of white-owned farmlands without due reimbursement or payment. when his actions against whites in zimbabwe were compared to those of hitler (which i think is a bit extreme but what's done is done) his response as to his actions was as follows: "This Hitler had only one objective: justice for his people, sovereignty for his people, recognition of the independence of his people and their rights over their resources...If that is Hitler, then let me be a Hitler tenfold.". remember that this is coming from the man who refused to recognize the election results when his people voted him out, the man who takes farms and land away from his people (both white and black) at random and holds them in his own name and refuses to allow his people to travel outside of zimbabwe. this does not sound like 'justice, sovereignty, independence and rights over resources' to me.

-mugabe has waged a violent campaign against homosexuality. homosexual acts are actually illegal in zimbabwe and his policy is to track and prosecute anyone suspected of being homosexual.

-mugabe over-printed the zimbabwean dollar creating hyperinflation and making it useless. his people now rely on US dollars to survive. if they cannot get US dollars then they are forced to live whatever kind of agrarian life they can. if they don't own land they farm the roadside. they are starving to death and he has refused aid from any other country or any international organization.

-his country is in economic free fall and yet he refuses aid of any sort.

-opposition leaders or people who speak out against him regularly disappear and are never heard from again. the fear of mugabe amongst his own people is so strong that they will not even mention his name when asked about what things are like in zimbabwe today.

i could go on but i think that that's enough to digest for the time being. more importantly, for me to truly tell you about all of the horrible things happening in zimbabwe i would have to write a blog post that would go on for pages. i would like all of you to go out and read and educate yourselves more fully about what's happening there. the more people who know and care the more our governments will be forced to listen when we stand up and say that something needs to be done about mugabe. in iraq we were met with opposition and a war that has gone on for more years than i care to think about. why are we not trying to stop mugabe in the way we did saddam? we would not be met with opposition but with thanks and cheers.

The Home Wrecker Chronicles

ahhh, i love the good celeb gossip story but none tops the list like a good tale of cheating husbands (because, let's face it, it's usually the blokes who are doing the leaving), scorned women (who are usually preggers) and younger, carnivorous home wrecking starlets.

there are so many of these stories to address and discuss but i think for sanity's sake we'll stick to just 4.

firstly, i would like to discuss the whole bridget moynahan/tom brady/gisele bundchen thing. i wanted to blog about this one first for a couple of reasons. 1) it's a little unclear as to whether moynahan and brady broke up while she was preggers but before he hooked up with bundchen (although general consensus seems to be that bundchen totally knew that he was with his baby-mama and went after him anyway) 2) this is the one that i really care the least about. i will give bundchen that she's uber-hot, so hot that i would sleep with her (but so is moynahan, for that matter) but really, she's just a model-- and not even a very interesting one at that. she was with boooooring leo dicaprio for ages and ages (who i only care a tiny bit about because of his efforts with all things eco-friendly. other than that, he's a crappy actor who thinks he's the bomb. blech). moynahan was in something that i think i liked once upon a time but i can't even remember what it was (way to make an impression, bridget). and brady's a football player (a hot one, granted, but if you don't play for the saints, aren't a manning or aren't getting it on with kim kardasssssian then i really don't care).

so the story is as follows (from what we know)-- bridget and tom were together for a good while (i think it was around 2 years, could be wrong about that), never married but then she was suddenly with child. she ran around exclaiming that she was so excited about the baby, blah blah but he remained pretty mum on the whole thing (obviously not so pleased about the situation). next thing we know, bridget is heavily preggers and on her own and gisele and tom are out and about everywhere.

the players:

bridget- she seems to be the coolest one in all of this. there was no complaining on her part. she didn't make a big show of being dumped and just went on her merry way saying, 'if i have to be a single mom, so be it'. final grade- most certainly an a+ for her behavior here.

tom- wanker. any man who leaves his preggers wife or gf is just a wanker. no way around it. since we're not sure that this is what happened if there's anyone who can jump in in his defense, go right ahead. otherwise, he's a miserable louse who left his girlfriend of 2 years when she was getting ready to drop his kid for a younger (and arguably hotter) woman. ON THE UP SIDE- it appears that since the baby has been born he's been a good dad. he gets points for this and for not being a total and complete douche. he's still a wanker though. final grade- D+ (would have failed, but the good dad bit lets him scrape by with a passing grade).

gisele- by all accounts she went to his locker room while he was still with bridget and totally seduced him. i've heard that she locked her beady little eyes on him after her bust-up with leo and said, 'he will be mine'. she didn't care that he was with his baby-mama and just went for it full-throttle. it's not even as if they met on some photo shoot and fell in love (stay tuned for that scenario). she PLANNED to go after him. nothing worse than the woman who wrecks a home on purpose. final grade-F. no questions asked.

NEXT on the list we have the weird (and brief) saga of robert rodriguez and rose mcgowan. we all know him as the director of 'sin city' and other such films and we know her because, well, we saw her ass in that dress when she was bonking marilyn manson (shudder).

the story is as follows-- she was single and starring in that non-entity of a film, 'grindhouse' and he was with his wife of 16 years (who was also his co-producer and mother of his 5 kids). rose and robert 'fell in love' on the set and began having an affair. it came out, mrs. rodriguez (sorry, don't know her name) was ripped apart by the news and filed for divorce. by all accounts, rose and robert continued their affair and might possibly still be out there somewhere fornicating (and by the laws of- you're not just sleeping with that person but with every person they've slept with- that means he's actually doing it with marilyn manson, which just adds another level of creepiness to the whole thing).

the players:

mrs. rodriguez- ugh, poor woman. she stands by this man for 16 years. gives him 5 kids, puts her time and money into his films (for which she gets about zero credit) and is blindsided by this whole thing. reports say that she was (and is) totally devastated. she hasn't come out bad-mouthing him or anything but is just trying to recover and protect her kids from creepy rose and their adulterous father. final grade- A+ for not going to the press and for divorcing that lying bastard straight away so that she could focus on the kids that he callously tossed aside.

robert- always discussed how much his wife meant to him, that he couldn't have done any of his films without her, lived this quiet little life with his 5 billion kids and said that he loved it. clearly it was all crap. as soon as rose (who so isn't that hot anyway) rolls up he jumps into bed with her without a second thought for his loyal and seemingly wonderfully supportive wife. he hasn't said much to the press other than that he 'fell in love' with rose and that he couldn't help it. whatever robert, maybe woody can get away with that 'the heart wants what it wants' shit but you're soooo not the artist he is so pack it in. you're a fuck-wad. final grade- F for abandoning his wife and kids for a skank (would still be an F if she wasn't a skank. just needed to be mentioned that she is).

rose- i don't know what to do about this one. it's not as if she targeted him or anything but she knew that he had a big happy family and went and jumped into his bed anyway. i would say that it's more his fault for leaving his family but she's crap for getting involved with a married man. final grade- D. she only passes because i think that perhaps she did just, 'fall in love' with him on set so she gets a passing grade. it's a low pass though because she should have resisted her urges and stayed away from a man who was taken, had a family, etc, etc.

NEXT we have the mary louise-parker/billy crudup/claire danes debacle. we all know her from 'weeds' (although i've never actually seen it) and the thousand other fabulous things she's done ('fried green tomatoes', 'saved', etc. needless to say, i love her and think she's sooo beautiful). he's that crappy actor who was the sore thumb son in 'big fish' and was one of the bad-good guys in that brad pitt (ohh, we're coming to him) film, 'sleepers'. whatever, he bites (and is not attractive AT ALL). claire we all loved from 'my so called life' but then started dropping like a lead balloon with such films as 'romeo and juliet' (i'm sorry to all of you who liked it but it was crap. really. crap. go watch the REAL version with olivia hussy and then come back and tell me that you thought claire and leo were good), that remake of 'the mod squad' (groan) and don't even get me started on 'stardust' (which, apparently-- meeg is my source here-- they wanted gwyneth for but she said no and so they drastically lowered their standards and went to claire).

the story is as follows: billy and mary had been together for something like 7 years. she was 8 months preggers with his kid. billy and claire were making some craptacular movie together (i don't even know the name of it) and 'fell in love' (yeah, that gem again-- wait for it, it's not the last time you'll read it). so, off go billy and claire (very un-apologetically) to leave mary to have the kid on her own.

the players:

mary- she's awesome. not only did she not make a bid deal about it in the press (although everyone was outraged on her behalf) but she actually named the kid after billy even though he had ditched her out of the blue. she was there on red carpets, promoting her stuff very soon after the news broke looking huge and glowing. she didn't let them see her cry. you go, mary. she still hasn't talked smack about them and is just going on with her life. final grade- A+ gotta love her!!

billy- total twat. unattractive, bad actor who leaves his gf of 7 years (who also happens to be 8-- yes EIGHT months preggers) for some young crappy actress. he made no apologies and just said, 'leave us alone, we love each other and it's right for us'. bullshit. he could at least have owned up to the fact that it was horrid timing on his part and that he was sorry that it happened the way it did but he didn't. he just dumped her and ran. final grade- F. LOSER.

claire- so not as attractive as mary (but like 20 years younger-- ok, that's a bit of an exaggeration) and can't even touch her as far as talent. she knew that billy was involved and yet threw herself in there anyway (not to mention the fact that she was, at the time, shacked up with singer, ben lee-- making her doubly slaggy). she was also unsympathetic to mary's plight and snubbed her nose at anybody who mentioned the fact that she ran off with mary's man. she's claire and thinks that she can be with anyone she wants, screw whomever gets hurt as that's not her problem. to top it off, after being with billy for 3 years it turns out that she cheated on him very recently with her new non-entity of a co-star and so the claire/billy thing if off. final grade- F. for being so uncaring about mary, for being a bad actor, for then cheating on billy and making the whole home wrecking thing a pointless endeavor.

LASTLY we have the mother of all home wrecking scenarios. the one you've all been waiting for...
jenn aniston/brad pitt/angelina jolie

ok, so we know this story backwards, frontwards, sideways and upside-down. we have 'the golden couple', brad and jenn. total a-listers. her hit tv show (plus her fabulous performance in 'the good girl' which everyone should see), his film career (with it's 'fight club' highs and 'the mexican' lows) and their sheer combined blond beauty made for the oh-so-right couple. there was lots of chatter before the meltdown about how he wanted kids (god, he wouldn't shut the fuck up about it) and she kept kind of mum about the whole thing (in my opinion she wanted to try to crack the film industry before getting preggers) but they still seemed like everything was a-ok. then came 'mr. and mrs. smith' and the divorce heard 'round the world. at first, brad and pukey claimed that they fell in love during the filming but that nothing happened until he was divorced. then recently vag-face came out and said that she DID pluck him during filming and that it was only now that she felt that it was ok to say that (and i think she did it because she's a jealous slag and if ANYBODY is getting more attention than she is she freaks out-- hello blood in a vial around your neck-- and she just wanted jenn to read that so that she would know that she'd really been cuckolded). now jenn is off searching aimlessly (and you can't get more aimless than john mayer) for that love lost while brad and angie are off with their brady bunch brokering a deal with benetton for a series of ads (no, not really).

the story is as follows: well, we just went through the story really but i think there's a little more. now, a lot of this is total speculation on my part but i think that a lot of you out there in cyber-land will agree that this is probably how it came down. angie and brad go to shoot this film. he's THE actor to land and she knows it. he wants kids and she has one (and wants more). she's hot in that, 'i look like my dad, my face looks like a vagina, i look waaaay older than 33, my body is weirdly proportioned and seriously are my lips about to explode off of my face?' sort of way. more importantly, she has an oscar for her lackluster performance in the self-indulgent film, 'girl, interrupted' (which we all know was crap), she comes from an a-list (although falling apart) hollywood family and she HAD THE ADORABLE KID. i think that herein lies the key to the whole thing. jenn's off filming and not getting preggers and here comes this woman who some people (inexplicably) think is hot and who is (OBVIOUSLY) a very manipulative woman who gets what she wants when she wants by any means necessary, she flirts, makes sure he sees her scantily clad, introduces the kid to him ("play with him, oh it's ok maddox, you can call him daddy") and BAM you have an instant implosion of the anniston-pitt home. then angie says, 'lets have tons more'-- again by any means necessary (and then comes the press announcement, 'we couldn't help it, we just fell in love'). this story particularly pisses me off because brad and angie are made out to be saints here. yeah, i'd have a dozen adopted kids if i could afford nannies for each one. i'd also be running around trying to help out in the sudan and cambodia and everywhere else if a) i could afford it and b) anybody would listen to me. then again, brad really has done a FANTASTIC thing with his, 'make it right' program here in new orleans (which angie has steered totally clear of so she gets none of her usual media-hogging spotlight credit for). i'm so sick of seeing angie with a head scarf on and the SAME look on her face in every war torn country she can get herself into (yeah, we get it. you want us to think you care.). un goodwill ambassador, my ass. what has she ACTUALLY done other than adopt kids (not to mention that one of them was like 4 when she adopted him and then she changed his name. that's just wrong)? NOTHING. brad's at least put his time, money and effort into 'make it right'. it also saddens me that jenn's still running around like a lost puppy. i'm so tired of seeing her with all of these wankers and yet i can't help but feel bad for her. i'm sure she's still so in love that it aches. really though, i don't know what to tell her. try to mend your broken heart by staying away from guys like john mayer and going for guys who will treat you well, maybe? or how about staying single until you're just over it? fuck, i don't know but something has to give with that poor woman.

the players-

jenn- can't help but feel bad for her. you KNOW that she's still in love with brad. she has to be. just look at her wonked out dating record since they broke up. she doesn't know where to go. plus, she has to be confronted on a daily basis with pics of the new super couple and their ever-expanding brood (not to mention the sheer horror of seeing things like those pics that brad took of angie and the kids for W magazine (i think it was)). i can't imagine the pain that must bring. you know she's just shouting that that was meant to be her life. she has stayed mum about it and hasn't really talked about it in anything but a joking way (i think she made some joke when an interviewer asked her if she ever talked to angie about how they all have holiday meals together or something). way to try to seem lighthearted about it and for not totally trashing angie every chance you get (cus i would have ripped slaggy's weave right off of her puffy, 45 year old looking head). final grade- B. i'm only giving her this grade because even though i sympathise with her plight and i KNOW she's desperate to fill the brad-sized hole in her heart there's just no excuse for john mayer. just none.

brad- ugh, this is tricky. somehow there's part of me that feels he's less to blame than angie is. maybe it's because i detest her so much, i'm not sure. maybe it's because i feel as if he was totally manipulated and brain-washed. i am very familiar with the, 'i really want kids' emotion and i can see being intoxicated by the cuteness that is maddox (and the promise of more cuteness to come). BUT when you really break it down he DID cheat on his wife. he DID leave her for another woman. maybe he really wasn't getting what he wanted (kids) but that's really no excuse for cheating (and especially not with uuughhh HER). final grade- C-. he cheated, that's bad. he's published pictures that he had to know jenn would see of his new little happy family that he took himself, that's cruel. BUT he really did want a family and that's what he has now. plus, i really think that he gets an upgrade because a) he's a really good dad (or so it seems) b) i have to love him for 'make it right' and c) i think he was totally manipulated by vag-face.

angie- ohhh, angie. how could you? you knew he was married. you waved your bj lips and big breasts in his face and then introduced him to the kid (knowing full well that that would be the clincher). you slept with him when you KNEW he was married, you are constantly making veiled remarks that are clearly aimed at her in the press, you rub your life with him in her face (you just lack decorum on every level possible- we saw it with the thing with billy-bob and then your dad and now jenn. get a grip on yourself) and you seem to be hyper-sensitive about him having ANY sort of contact with her at all- as if he's going to see the light and go running back to him (afraid that she'll do to you what you did to her? are you that insecure? really? oh, i believe it. i believe it alllll the way). i think you manipulated the whole situation and you looooove the spotlight and now you have it shining on you more brightly than you could have ever imagined. well played. final grade- F. the ultimate homewrecker. ironically, thinking about her being the ultimate homewrecker makes me think about the fact that now brad has the home that he always wanted-- one that is full of adorable kids, philanthropy, globe-trotting and would-be wife.

maybe she manipulated him into the life he always wanted but never had and now he's happy. damn it all, maybe (just maybe) it's better for him that angie came into his life. still... it's not fair that jenn has to wander the earth for all eternity to pay for being in love with him. uughh, quandry!!

you decide and let me know.

The Scottish Breeding Program(me)

ok, so i've only just noticed this really bizarre thing. right now, there are 3 scottish actors (and sean connery totally doesn't count because a) where the hell is he? and b) he's so scottish that he's mildly off-putting even to scottish people) that are big, recognizable hollywood players. that's not the bizarre thing, though... wait for it...

so first we have my fave (as you all know) of the three...

james mcavoy. i heart james mcavoy. the eyes, the smile, the accent, the film choices. i really liked 'last king of scotland' and 'atonement'. there are tons of others that he did before that-- not to mention the first place i saw him (and the point at which i called that he was going to be a huge star-- a label which, if i happen to tag you with means that you WILL become an a-lister-- ask meeg about the harry potter/twilight guy and how i called that one, too) the television show 'shameless'. we all know what he looks like but we're coming to that...

then there's gerard butler. hot, yes. was in that weird '300' movie that i have yet to see because i really have no interest in watching semi-animated men fight for 2 hours, and 'p.s. i love you' which i did see and, well... there's just no excuse for. his mockery of an irish accent when he has a lovely mcavoy-esque glaswegian thing going on in real life (and just don't get me started on who on earth would want to be with the horse of a woman, can't fathom why she keeps winning oscars, annoying as hell hillary swank) and the whole premise make the thing unwatchable. i can't even think of what else he's been in but he's been linked with every starlet from travis barker's ho of an ex- what's her face blond woman- to poor cuckolded jenny aniston. we all know what he looks like, too. dubious film and sexual partner choices aside- he's pretty damn hot, too...

lastly we have the enigmatic ewan mcgregor. who doesn't love dear ewan. although where the hell has he been? is he still in hiding after george lucas raped him in the star wars prequels? or maybe it's just shame because now a couple of people have actually seen 'the island' and he never thought it would come to that. still, we forgive him those sins for the great gifts that he's given us; things like, 'trainspotting', 'big fish' (which i understand there's some debate about but i liked it), 'little voice', 'velvet goldmine', 'the pillow book'... i could go on (and i do understand that there are some sprinklings of crap in there as well but none are as bad as 'star wars' so if we can forgive that then we can forgive 'molin rouge'-- or can we?). i think that we can all agree that when he's on, he's on. i think that we can also agree that he is just undeniably hot. he's shorter and thinner than gerard butler (much more a mcavoy physique) but soooo sexy (totally different accent though as he's from perth and our other two boys are glaswegian). i think that we have all come to the opinion that he, like the other two aforementioned gentlemen, is hot...

now, here's where the freak show bizarreness enters.

why the hell do all three of them look so similar? and why is it that i didn't notice this until i saw little clips of bulter looking like mcavoy then mcavoy looking like mcgregor? they're like superman and clark kent. you never see them together so you never notice how much they look alike. well, watch out faithful readers because i'm about to pull the glasses off this mo-fo!!

ok, so i will grant you that there are minor differences here and there BUT their eyes are all big and the same shade of blue (although that pic of mcavoy does his eyes NO justice- but if you've seen 'last king of scotland' you know what i'm talking about). their ears are the same, their faces are similarly shaped and they all have the same chin (although, yes, ewan has the weird chin-dimple thing but the shape of the chin is the same!). i know that james and ewan are both short at 5'7'' ish and both thin and gerard is some buff giant of a man, but look at the shapes of their faces. even with the height difference between the arguable better two and the buff one their faces are still the same shape. i ask you... WHAT the HELL is going on in scotland? are they breeding these guys to all look the same? they give them tiny differences (james and ewan have gingery beards but gerard's is dark, james and ewan are short and gerard is taller, ewan has the weird chin-dimple and the others don't) but when it comes down to it they all look as if they could be related. seriously, they could be brothers, could they not?!?!? i think that james and ewan look so alike that it's a little scary. gerard is maybe the cousin to the two short brothers but he's still in the family. don't deny it. i know you see it's there!!

my ultimate question is... if they're breeding hot scottish men, why are they not sending more out into the world? i found one for myself but there are other women (and men) out there in need. two of these three are married (and keep your hands off of mine) and gerard is just sort of whoring about so there need to be more of these guys released into the general population. send them here to the states. screw the recession, we will find work for them, even if it's just making them stand in front of a camera and badly recite lines (i'm looking at you here, gerard).

have a very scottish holiday season everyone!

The Gift of Time

so last night gavin, kyle and i went to see a screening of my friend franis' film, 'The Gift Of Time'. it was really an amazing film. i don't want to give too much away about it but we were all very moved by the story and its content and i think that everyone could really benefit from seeing it. it's a documentary style film that has elements that i think apply to every family and relationship. it's very much about the way that we act towards our families, the things that we do to one another, how we hurt each other and the fact that even under the worst conditions there is still hope for redemption, forgiveness and the renewal of love.

beyond that, it's a movie that i would recommend simply based on the fact that i enjoyed it so much.

everyone should check out the trailer for the film--

http://www.giftoftimemovie.com/

Just a bit of an update...

So, due to a series of family tragedies my boss has decided to close shop. He said that he would pay me the check that he owes me on the 1st of december but i somehow doubt that i'll be getting that (although i really do need it for rent, bills, savings, etc). so here i am... unemployed. we still have some saving to do to be able to make it to scotland in april, i obviously still have bills to pay until then and the market is bare. i'm doing my best to find something but i fear that i will end up at yet another coffee shop making just enough to make ends meet (i hope).
my father and my father in law have said that they won't let it come down to us not having the money to move, so that's one good thing.
really there's no other news. i have tons of packing to do, lots of furniture and books, etc to give away (or sell) and only a few months to do it in.
i can't wait to move and to have all of this stress behind me (and i hope to find a job soon- i know it won't be until after the thanksgiving holidays but i really need something to materialize).
i hope that all of you who read this (and know me personally) are planning on coming out and visiting once we're out there and settled. you know i love you all and would love to have you come visit any time you like.
again, just keeping you posted as to what's up with me.

we'll be doing lots of fun nola stuff in the time that we have left here so if any of you find yourselves in new orleans give us a call and we'll go have an adventure!!

hope you're all well.

happy thanksgiving

i'm thankful for the love of my family and friends.
i'm thankful that i have a place to live and food on my table.
i'm thankful that i have a good life and a chance at an even better one.
i'm thankful that me, my friends and family are all safe, happy (for the most part), and healthy.
i'm thankful for all of you.

much love to you all.

Thanksgiving is Neigh (and christmas and new year's and mardi gras)

amazingly enough thanksgiving is fast approaching. here in new orleans thanksgiving sparks off a series of holidays that doesn't end until february 24th.

first we begin with tofurkey day. somehow that doesn't seem to end until almost the end of november. everyone has that 4 day weekend during which they gorge themselves and sleep way too much (i won't even mention the drinking). for some it is a time to spend with loved ones and family-- a happy occasion filled with laughter and fun. for others it's the time of the year during which you can't escape the people you do your best to ignore for 10 months out of the year.

my brother, robin, always says that it's his favorite holiday. there's lots of food, no obligatory presents, drink, merriment and the odd familial argument that is forgotten as soon as there are plates on the table laden with food (at which point all differences are put aside).


i agree with him to a certain extent. not much is expected of anyone on thanksgiving. you show up (either alone or with your wife/husband/partner/kids) and you sit around with people you've known all of your life and you simply eat until you pass out. there is no pressure (except the pressure put on the poor sod that has to cook everything- a good way to alleviate this is to have everyone bring something to the table. let that one person cook the turkey- or tofurkey, as the case may be- and let everyone else bring something that is instrumental to the meal). if everyone pitches in with the dishes then it should be a stress-free holiday for all. it's the perfect time to reminisce about all of the insane things your parents/spouses/siblings/kids have done in the past (but keep it light-hearted so that nobody gets offended!). good laughs can be had by all and it's a perfect familial bonding day.

as soon as thanksgiving is over, however, the rush towards christmas has begun. the day (and weekend) after this most precious of holidays is instantly taken over by the christmas rush. correct me if i'm wrong but isn't the day after thanksgiving known as black friday? the friday (and weekend) after thanksgiving is the biggest shopping day/weekend of the year!! nothing like getting a jump on things!!

so, after thanksgiving we have less than a month to decorate (buy trees and lights and all of that nonsense-- not to mention presents for everyone you've ever met. it's not a time for just spending time with family. it's a time to see if you are going to get what you've been angling for all year. unlike thanksgiving, christmas is not a low-pressure familial romp down memory lane. it's a time to feign delight at the socks that your auntie margret got you (even though you're 30 and you have more socks than you know what to do with). it's not a time of laughing together with no strings attached, it's a time to guage how well your family and friends know you (and how much they like you-- if they get you something at all, that is). christmas dinner can be quite pleasant (if people aren't still bitter about the wonky presents that they've received) but the main thought on everyone's mind is always, 'why didn't i get what i really wanted?'. i, for a long time, labored under the delusion that christmas was a time when we were grateful that our loved ones thought enough about us to go get us presents at all, that it was a spiritual holiday, that we should be happy to be alive and together and to sing carols and one another's praises. i suppose i was wrong.

then, not a week later we have new year's to deal with... plans to go out (parties, bars, intimate celebrations, morning hangovers, resolutions-- and then (in new orleans on new year's day- it's time for cabbage and black-eyed peas- cabbage means wealth all year round and black-eyed peas are for a year's worth of health) for the rest of the world it is then done and dusted...


the holiday season is over and done with-- unless you're in new orleans.


as soon as the new year starts we in new orleans have something altogether different to contend with... the beginning of mardi gras. this year (the 24th of february) is mardi gras day. the parades begin about 3 weeks before the day itself but preparations for the day begin almost as soon as new year's is over with. mardi gras itself is sooo much fun but when you pack holiday on top of holiday it gets a little exhausting. all you want is a break from having to be around everyone you know all of the time.

ok, that's not really totally true. i love being with my family on thanksgiving. i love giving them presents on christmas. i love seeing in the new year. i love seeing my friends on mardi gras.

it all just seems (as i get older, i suppose) that it's just one thing on top of another. it all starts at the end of november and then goes straight on through until the end of february!!

maybe i am an old lady or maybe i'm just old hat at the new orleans non-stop partying and it's wearing me out. i bet you anything that when i move i'll miss it though. no thanksgiving in the uk, no mardi gras... just that week of christmas and new years. now i think that that's it's exhausting. perhaps at this time next year i'll be bored and i'll be pining for the non-stop excitement of my hometown.

i guess we'll just have to wait and see...

Hope Dawns...

i know that it's a little bit late for this and that i should have posted this the night of or day after the election but i have to say congratulations to my man obama. i know that if you go back and read past entries that i was all for hillary at the beginning but i have learned the error of my ways. i couldn't be happier that obama won (and it's not just about beating out mccain). i'm still a little upset about the whole, 'si se puede' thing, but i think that i can get over that.
i do know that this marks a change in american politics and i hope and pray that he can live up to the emense burden that we've placed on his shoulders. i have faith in him and i hope that all of you do as well. i'm not sure that i ever thought that i would see the day when we would have a black president (that wasn't colin powell).
bravo, obama. i'm proud of you. i voted for you and i'm putting my faith in you (as we all are-- no pressure, mind!). good luck. i know that you can and will turn this country around. i'm proud to call you president.
my only regret is that i didn't buy a box of obama o's! they're still available as far as i can tell...
here's the link if anyone's still interested!!

http://www.airbedandbreakfast.com/obamaos

what a pain...

so, the countdown has begun...
soon enough i will no longer be writing from the streets of katrinaville, rather i will be writing from the streets of northeastern scotland...
of course the tone will change (not that many people will notice...) but i hope to be able to strike a good balance between what was and what will be. i hope that the few people who read this will enjoy what i have planned. i know that once i move i will have a lot more time to write (and hopefully i will soon have good news about progress concerning our move!).
i just wanted to write to let all of you know that i haven't forgotten about you but that things have been a bit hectic on my end. i promise to write more as things begin to calm down and become more settled (one can but hope).
love to all and i will write again soon.
hope to hear from all of you.
xxx
nic

VOTE!!!

yeah, that's really all i had to say. everyone who can needs to get out on election day and vote. gavin's chomping at the bit to vote. sadly, he's not a citizen so he can't. you, gentle reader (all three of you), can-- so make sure you cast your ballots. whether it's early or on the day... just make sure you get your ass out there!

The time is flying by...

So, here we find ourselves in (almost) mid-October. Halloween is around the corner (I'm already sad that I won't get to see what Meeg is going to dress up as) and fall is most certainly upon us. It's getting cooler here in the city of the never-ending blinding sunlight and daylight savings ends in less than a month. To think that this is the last Autumn that I'll spend here is a little more than bizarre. I don't know that it's really sunk in. Once Halloween hits, it's all just going to be a torrent of activity from there. Gavin's birthday, our anniversary, Thanksgiving... November is chock full of things that make the time seem to fly. Then there's Christmas and New Year. Right after that we have to finish paying for our transport and then Mardi Gras is upon us. In early March I have to apply for my visa and by mid-April I will be on a boat watching this country receed into the distance. Makes me think of all of the people I know who read this (or don't read this), the people I really write it for (when I write), my friends.
Maybe I'm just feeling sappy and sentimental but I'll miss all of my friends. Even the ones I don't see or talk to so much anymore. It's all going to change. In the blink of an eye it won't just be a function of me not seeing friends because we're all busy, it'll be a function of not seeing people because they're a world away. I know that I'm not leaving for another 5 and a half months but I'm still beginning to miss you all already.
Just wanted that out there. I know I'm leaving and who knows when or if I'll ever come back. I appreciate all of you who've been my friends for all this time. I love all of you and hope that the distance that is soon to come between us doesn't diminish the friendships that we have.
xxxxx
nic

Wrong Palin, John!! We wanted Micheal!!!

ok, so i have a confession to make. many years ago (and i think i'm going to blame post-storm trauma on this one) meeg and i were having a conversation in which i stated that if it came down to mccain versus some AWFUL dem candidate that i would go with mccain. i have to say (in my defence) that at the time he seemed a lot more harmless- although in retrospect, was he ever harmless? ANYWAY- when meeg said, 'how bad would the dem candidate have to be?' i responded with, 'ok, let's say it was kathleen blanco versus john mccain. in that case, i would totally be all about mccain.'

i think it's funny that now mccain has picked the republican, crazy version of blanco as his running mate. seriously, a one term governor who is for everything i am against and who i just KNOW that when mccain's 127 year old ticker gives out will make a total mess of things (remember blanco's 'deer in the headlights' look just before katrina? that's how i see palin looking for the entirety of her term after mccain kicks it. not good, not good at all.

i don't have to tell you all about all of her craziness- her preggers teenage daughter (which, in itself, i am not really going to judge- i just think it's funny that the republicans are NOW all saying that we should stay out of her personal life... hmm... that sounds like it's really quite the opposite of what they were saying when clinton got a bj from an intern- but whatevs), her penchant for hunting and fishing, her total disregard for anything environmental (she believes in global warming but doesn't think it's our fault?!!?!), she wants to open up alaska for drilling and thinks we should be able to shoot wolves. NICE.

so, not like my vote wasn't locked for obama already, but now that mccain is running with bizzaro-blanco i'm going to actually have to enlist to help with the obama campaign (phone calls and what not) rather than just casting a vote.

oh, and i know palin is younger and has better skin/hair- but tell me that there isn't some freaky resemblance here!!!

and this is just on my block!

so, gustav has passed us by. all we ended up getting was a little water in the apartment from the rain, some damage to the outside of the house, 18 hours with no power, and tons of debris and fallen trees. could have been soooo much worse. i know that there are areas that were hit much, much harder, but we were largely spared.

here are just some of the pics i took when i ventured out into the crazy gusting winds to see what was up (seriously, i actually fell over a few times from the force of the winds).

ohhh gustav!!

seriously,
can this be happening again?
the day after i was supposed to have my birthday party a hurricane hits (wait, did we just time warp to 2005?!?).
at least this time bush made a statement BEFORE the hurricane hit. maybe fema, etc. will actually be prepared this time. who knows? what i do know is that new orleans can't afford to take another hit. we just can't. emotionally, psychologically, economically... we just can't afford it!

well, i hope it doesn't flood, or maybe that it floods just enough that fema feels it necessary to hand out some well-deserved checks. they can take the money from the money they're pouring into the war. wow, that sounds selfish AND terribly greedy. whatever, i'm bitter about my birthday. i think i deserve to be a little pouty at the moment! another birthday with no presents!! (ok, that's a lie- gavin gave me something and so did stephanie). still, this is the second time in four years!!
at least we can all take comfort in the fact that no matter how screwed we are, george bush actually knows it's happening this time. ah, how times have changed (even though i think it's just an excuse to not have to go to the convention- but whatever).

good luck to everyone and for everyone who's elsewhere- pray, cross your fingers, sacrifice goats, whatever you do... do it for us and hope that we make it through.

i'll talk to all of you on the other side!

much love,
nic

ACLU study on racial disparity in arrests in orleans and surrounding parishes. shocking? horribly, it's not.

One of my best friends, Katie, is an attorney at ACLU Louisiana. They recently did a study on racial disparity and arrests in Orleans and surrounding parishes. The results are astounding and yet not surprising. We don't just need to fix buildings in New Orleans, people!! We need to fix the way we treat each other. This city would be in much better shape if we worked together more instead of judging and fighting one another. We're all New Orleanians, we're all people. We should strive for so much more than just rebuilding, we should also strive for equality.
As a great man once (sort of) said...
A city divided against itself cannot stand!!!

From the Times Pic....


Report studies race in arrests
It sees disparity with parish populations
Thursday, August 07, 2008
By Jeff Adelson

Minorities make up 16 percent of the population in St. Tammany Parish, but they represent 31 percent of those arrested in the unincorporated areas in the first quarter of 2007, according to a three-parish study by the ACLU, which says racial profiling remains a problem in Louisiana.

The report, which studied arrests in St. Tammany, Avoyelles and De Soto parishes, calls for increased oversight of traffic stops to monitor and prevent any racial profiling throughout the state.

"The findings continue to show that racial profiling continues to be a problem," said Liza Grote, who is working on a racial justice fellowship for the organization. "The current state of the law is not getting done what needs to get done, which is racially blind policing tactics."

But the St. Tammany Sheriff's Office, which patrols the unincorporated areas of the parish, disputed the report's conclusions, arguing that more study is needed to determine whether the disparity is caused by racial motivations or other factors.

"We target people based on criminal behavior, not on the color of their skin," Maj. Fred Oswald said.

In Slidell, with a 22 percent minority population, about 34 percent of those arrested were minorities. Covington's population is made up of about 27 percent minorities, but minorities made up about 41 percent of those arrested.

Slidell Police Chief Freddy Drennan said Wednesday that he does not condone racial profiling nor does he believe it exists in his department.

"We teach (about) racial profiling in our academy and have done so since 2002," he said. "It is something that we're 100 percent compliant on. That is something that is mandatory and that they have to have before they graduate from the academy."

A Covington police spokesman said the department had not seen the study and would have no immediate comment on it.

Mandeville Police, patrolling a city with a 10 percent minority population, reported that about 11 percent of those arrested were minorities.

The study by the ACLU's Louisiana chapter took arrest data from agencies in the three parishes and compared the rate at which minorities are jailed to the percentage of minority residents in each parish. Information on arrests comes from the first three months of 2007, according to the report. The parishes were chosen to show a spectrum of rural and urban areas and based on complaints from residents, Grote said.

Grote described the practice of racial profiling as being "ineffective policing in addition to being unconstitutional."

Because of a loophole in Louisiana law, few agencies report statistics on traffic stops, preventing the ACLU from analyzing these directly, Grote said. As a result, the organization focused on arrest data in an effort to spur reform and require greater transparency on police procedures, she said.

Better policies would help "law enforcement officers be more cognizant of their actions and think more about what they're doing when they're stopping people," Grote said.

In Avoyelles Parish, 39 percent of those arrested were minorities, while they make up about 33 percent of the population. The city of Bunkie had the highest disparity, with minorities making up 80 percent of all those arrested when they comprise only 52 percent of the city's population.

In De Soto, 53 percent of those arrested were minorities, while minorities make up 42 percent of the parish population.

A state law adopted in 2001 was intended to monitor and curtail racial profiling by requiring agencies to track the race of all motorists involved in traffic stops and submit these statistics to the state's Department of Public Safety. However, the law exempts from these requirements any agency with a written policy against racial profiling, leaving it a "largely empty gesture," according to the report.

The ACLU referred to this exemption as "an enormous loophole" and notes that the overwhelming majority of agencies adopted such a policy.

St. Tammany Parish Sheriff's Office officials don't dispute the numbers in the ACLU's report, but said that further analysis is needed to show why minorities were being arrested at a higher rate.

What's needed, Maj. Oswald said, is an evaluation that separates arrests made because of calls to police and those resulting from proactive methods, such as traffic stops. But even those numbers could be problematic because of the Sheriff's Office's narcotics and street crimes divisions, which conduct operations largely in the parish's poorer neighborhoods, Oswald said.

These areas often have a larger concentration of minorities than the parish as a whole but the operations usually are lauded by many in those communities, he said.